Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
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