just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Randomize
