The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
