***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
