I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
