i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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