I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
is it fun? or sober?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
