Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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