just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize