You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
