The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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