It was confusing and full of hummus
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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