i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
FUCK WHALES
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