My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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