heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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