friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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