I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Randomize
