Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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