Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize
