I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
