My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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