Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
