the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
tell me about the fingering
Randomize