im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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