Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize