32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
