Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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