Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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