I love having hate sex.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
