i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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