Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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