oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
We need a shit load of segways right now
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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