So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
