it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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