He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize