Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
