another moral hangover. fuck.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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