His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
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