I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
