Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Houston, we have a blender
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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