Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize