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Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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