i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
