dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
