so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize