I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
