AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize