i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
