I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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