shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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