kristin has been a bad kristin
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
