how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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